sn:/crossing the line

[eighth_horizon]

Story #3: written for deirdre_c

Crossing The Line

Gen, R, 13,218 words. <3<3

Comments

[lyra-wing.livejournal.com]

Oh babe, how much do I always love your stuff? I mean -- ALWAYS.

And you know what gets me? It's how you weave the supernatural and the character development together so well.

A lot of times, with fic, it's either all baddies and monsters and plot, or all angst and relationship issues.

But with you, the supernatural becomes the means through which Sam and Dean learn more about themselves, and each other, and that, my dear, is... awesome.

[eighth-horizon.livejournal.com]

>>the supernatural becomes the means through which Sam and Dean learn more about themselves, and each other, >>

OMG, thank you. You know what? I had no idea that that's what I've been trying to do, until you put it that way.

[zionsstarfish.livejournal.com]

oh my GOD.

I never thought going NOWHERE could be soooooo incredibly creepy. My reading slowed right down when I got to the third verse, and I couldn't shake the creeped out feeling until Sam rolled down the window.

Oh, Dean. I love how you just let them talk, and *trust* that the reader will pick up all the intangibles.

♥, so much!

[eighth-horizon.livejournal.com]

>>you just let them talk, and *trust* that the reader will pick up all the intangibles>>

Supernatural fans are the smartest and most obsessed of all! I can totally trust all of you to pick stuff up. XD Thanks.

[(Anonymous)]

Holy time-loop! What a nail-biter. And what a great story about their relationship. It's great to just listen to them talk and hear all the subtext underneath. I really enjoyed this fic, as I do all of your work.Thanks so much,
DC

[eighth-horizon.livejournal.com]

Thank you!!

[maygra.livejournal.com]

:::FLAILING:::

Sheesh, what you do to me. This is amazing and creepy and creepily amazing. I love the way they snipe at each other, and he way Dean keeps trying to protect Sam from the worst of himself, and Sam keeps pushing because he doesn't need it.

::shoehorns it into the existing universes::: becasue, seriously, dude! it's a lovely fit...a even if there's a harder, darker edge to Dean in this...but it's like Sam gives him the hand he needs to get back from it...

:::flails more::: I love this.

[eighth-horizon.livejournal.com]

Muwahaha, I made you flail. Thanks!

::counterflails::

Sam will always give Dean a hand. He almost can't help it. And, you know, if that came out sounding dirty, then, okay. LOL

Dean-muse was a little grouchy and heartbroken in this one, when I look back on it (and I never read it through until just before I posted it last night) since I was, too.

[monkiedude.livejournal.com]

Wow, dude. This was really REALLY really amazing. There were so many single lines that just completely describe Sam and Dean. Like Sam thinking about Dean needing him more than he needs Dean. Like the whole thing with the thing packing a wallop. And Dean insisting that they're good at figuring out puzzles ...

I REALLY enjoyed it.

And also may love Sam (and you) a little for this line: "Nice to know there are orifices you won't go for"

[eighth-horizon.livejournal.com]

THANKS!

>>And also may love Sam (and you) a little for this line: "Nice to know there are orifices you won't go for.">>

Sam is the snarkiest little brother ever

[deirdre-c.livejournal.com]

OMG Bob!!!

This is beyond my wildest dreams! Brilliant! Amazing! It Was Better than Cats!!! *dances around like a madwoman*

I love the scene at the bridge and how you set up the timeloop and the tiny changes to the conversation in the car and the meta about Journey and Zepplin and OMG it's THE BEST!

Sam leaned across the seat on his elbows to jeer up at Dean through the open driver's side window. "Don't worry. I'll touch it up with a Sharpie or something."
Man, Sam can push Dean's buttons something fierce.

Your banter is like catnip... I just want to roll around in it all day!
"That's one of the other things that kills me," Dean said. "Smart, that mouth."
"You'd cry your eyes out," Dean said, pitching his voice just as low. "Then find some way to blame yourself. Hopefully I'll go deaf, too, so I don't have to listen to the bitching."
"If the orthopedic shoe fits, grandpa."
"Nice to know there are orifices you won't go for,"

If Dean wanted him to know, he'd tell him. Sometimes, when he was tired enough, he accepted that.
This line jumped out at me even before I'd read the rest of the story. The two of them are pratically inside each other's skins, and yet they're also separated miles apart by all these secrets and unspoken needs. And they take turns picking at that barrier, but it never all comes down.

He opened his mouth to scream for Sam and couldn't.
Wow. So I'm trying to think about whether I've ever heard Dean call out to Sam for help. Not in Phantom Traveler, not in Faith, not in Shadows. And we know that even in the direst circumstances, he would never draw Sam into the danger zone. But there's also that pride thing going on here (He was careful not to say 'if you're wrong' because Dean wouldn't hear anything else if he did), and Sam knows both of those things better than anyone.

"Kids'll flock for miles. Didn't you ever see Stand By Me?" *GLEE*

There's that point in every single one of your stories where your Dean (not canon Dean) just owns me. And this is it:
"Bullshit," Dean said, and Sam could see the gleam of anticipation in his eyes. A dogs chasing cars anticipation. "It's my bridge, now."

I just want to quote the whole scene where they argue about who's going out onto the bridge to set the charges. There are about 18 different things going on there between them, and you convey all of them simply through dialog (stated and unstated). How in the hell do you do that? *is blown away*

"Like how you're on the way to destruction, make your time?" Dean said. "Take off every zig for great justice?"
You are EVOL. *g*

It just takes four little words to break my heart into tiny pieces:
"For one day, you have to laugh at everything I do and say - that's meant to be funny, anyway - out loud, like you used to."

These little moments you sprinkle around stand out less than some of your other verbal pyrotechnics, but they touch me deeply.
Then Sam watched while Dean poked around a little more to flip rocks and branches with his boots before he came to stand with Sam again. Neither said a word. Something seemed to shift between them after a minute or so, and they went back to the car.

I went in there like the goddamn A-Team.
Cha-ching!

And you manage to slip in a little nod to the slashers!
"What, you don't think I could make a killing with this mouth?"

I wasn't really creeped out by the story until this:
"Are we dead?" Dean said.
The starkness and practicality of that line. The way he expects Sam to answer. And dread goes from 0 to 60 starting right there. *shudder*

"Don't let me trap us here," Dean said finally.
Oh, Dean. The crushing weight. And people say Sam has issues with guilt.

I can't even quote the final version of Dean's story and Sam's hearing of it, because it BROKE me. Utterly.

And then:
It was a killer song, when done with a decent vocal.
*flail to infinity*

Barb, I am so floored by this story! I love it more than I can say.

[eighth-horizon.livejournal.com]

>>OMG Bob!!!

This is ALL YOUR FAULT!

I'm so glad you liked it, doll. :)

>>So I'm trying to think about whether I've ever heard Dean call out to Sam for help. >>

Or anybody. I think the first time I ever heard him do something like that was Devil's Trap. The closest he's ever come before was telling Sam "I can't do this alone" in the pilot.

>>I wasn't really creeped out by the story until this:
"Are we dead?" Dean said.
The starkness and practicality of that line. The way he expects Sam to answer. And dread goes from 0 to 60 starting right there. *shudder*>>

See? He just assumes Sam would know. I love these guys. ::shakes fist at Kripke::

[tenillypo.livejournal.com]

Wow. I think I've told you how much I adore your Sam and Dean, right? Because you just have this way of keeping them utterly true to themselves and yet so revealing at the same time. I'm kind of in awe. :-)

I don't know how you do it, but I love this.

"It's all safe now, punkin'," Dean said with no small amount of sarcasm. "Are your knees wobbly? Does him need a wittle help to the car?"

*snorts*
Oh, Dean. Every time I think I couldn't possibly love you any more, you go and say something like that.

[marinarusalka.livejournal.com]

Oh, man, nobody does creepy atmosphere like you do. The opening scenes at the bridge gave a taste of it, but the way the wrongness of the time loop slowly snuck up on Sam was just spine-chilling. And the way Dean's story kept changing little by little, building up to that horrifying final version. I think the moment that got to me most, though, was the one where they look out at the horizon and realize that it's not actually a horizon. *shudder* That one's gonna stay with me for a while.

[adelheide.livejournal.com]

"'Only because you put up with it,' Sam said.


Dean whipped a glare at him.


Sam shrugged. 'Me and dad...Dean, we aren't gonna change. Quit putting up with our shit. We're the only things you're afraid of.'"

And with that, you made me your slave. How much have I wanted Sam to say that to Dean? A whole whoppin' lot, let me tell ya!

It was very...gray and grainy. That's just the impression that kept coming across as I read. Which really doesn't tell you much and I apologize. But that was the feeling I got. Very viceral.

[eighth-horizon.livejournal.com]

>>And with that, you made me your slave. How much have I wanted Sam to say that to Dean? A whole whoppin' lot, let me tell ya!>>

He's so overdue to say it on the show. LOL! Sometime next season, he'll just have to.

Thanks!!

[janissa11.livejournal.com]

That was just about the best SPN story I've yet encountered. Seriously. Both sides -- the casework, if you will, and the personal, so neatly and deftly intertwined that it's seamless, beautifully organic.

Holy cow. That is tremendous work there. I'm reccing the crap out of this. Kudos!

[eighth-horizon.livejournal.com]

>>That was just about the best SPN story I've yet encountered.>>

NO WAY. ::hides eyes:: Thank you, so much. And double thanks for the rec!

[grayscaled.livejournal.com]

Wow. This is just...wonderful. Plot and characterization and snark and all sorts of good stuff all at the same time. Fantastic. If I tried to quote all the lines I loved, I'd be here for the rest of the day.

Though if I'm going to be really honest (har), you had me at the Monty Python reference. What can I say, I'm easy.

[eighth-horizon.livejournal.com]

Thanks!!

I have a feeling Dean quotes MP whenever he really wants to drive someone crazy. XD

Your icon makes me laugh every time I see it.

[mellaithwen]

*dead from the sheer brilliance of it all*

[eighth-horizon.livejournal.com]

XD <3 Thanks!!

[the-jackalope.livejournal.com]

That was just... I have no words. Really, really good. Spot on characterizations. Pain and humor comingled. Wow.

[eighth-horizon.livejournal.com]

Thanks much!

[anti-em.livejournal.com]

The thing I love best about your writing is that it takes me no effort at all to hear and see the boys doing these things. That makes all the creepiness even more tangible. I'm off to read some sorbet now.

[eighth-horizon.livejournal.com]

omg I made you need sorbet! I should so write you some sorbet-fic. XD

[pheebs1.livejournal.com]

Fave lines of this amazing amazing fic:
The grooves of an old vinyl record would only support the needle for so long before the needle could no longer jump.

"dad thought he had a lead on the thing that, if you think about it, pretty much killed us all."

Sam stayed quiet. He couldn't react. He couldn't be part of it, and he knew it.

"Feeling sorry for myself. Like I was easy to leave. If it worked, then we could get what we needed and get out of there, together. If it didn't, then they would shoot my dumb ass and put me out of my misery."

He paused to swallow, and to Sam it sounded like it hurt.

The silence that followed would have been intolerable even without the world dying outside.

Sam shrugged. "Me and dad...Dean, we aren't gonna change. Quit putting up with our shit. We're the only things you're afraid of."

And Sam laying it out for Dean right there. Loved this. So amazing.

[eighth-horizon.livejournal.com]

Aw, thanks!

[dazedandhappy.livejournal.com]

That was so spooky. Ate half a bag of Goldfish while reading it out of nervousness.

I love your Dean because he's so Dean, but at the same time reveals more of himself then TV Dean ever does, yet in a realistic a plausible way.

Awesome. :o)

[eighth-horizon.livejournal.com]

Thanks!

Now I'm craving Goldfish. The little rainbow-colored ones. Prettiest snack ever.

[transtempts.livejournal.com]

ee!

Have to run and pick up relative at ferry, and so am saving this, but will mail you later with squeeful comments.

Prelim - Fic yay! Oooh...nice.

[eighth-horizon.livejournal.com]

LOL Thanks doll! I am seriously frickin' late replying to everything, shame on me.

[geminigrl11.livejournal.com]

Sam shrugged. "Me and dad...Dean, we aren't gonna change. Quit putting up with our shit. We're the only things you're afraid of."

These? Are the truest words ever written about Dean. And Sam telling him to not put up with it.

When will you cease blowing my ever-lovin' doors off? I think - never.

[eighth-horizon.livejournal.com]

Hey, thanks. And he's as afraid for them as he is of them. What a way to live. ::huggles Dean:: ::slaps him upside the head::

[http://users.livejournal.com/amy_star_/]

Loved it. And after reading it, it occured to me that I had never read any of your longer works... so I stayed up till 5:30 AM reading. :)

[eighth-horizon.livejournal.com]

OMG poor you. lol Thanks so much!

[verabell.livejournal.com]

Oh what a great story. Creepy and amazingly well written, with a great balance of the 'case' and the emotional. Just lovely work.

[eighth-horizon.livejournal.com]

Oh, thanks. I really appreciate the kudos. :)

[estei.livejournal.com]

Stop breaking my brain with your genius.

No, wait, I've changed my mind. The brain is overrated anyway.

What I loved about this story, aside from everything, was how dark you went with Dean. This obviously isn't the darkest, spookiest scenario you've written, but the Dean here is bringing the serious fucked up stuff. The gradual revelation of the real story behind the drug house was completely gripping.

I also love how ambiguous the baddie remained the whole time, and how I never really felt the need to want more information on it. Dean's use of the symbols was freaking inspired, as was the idea that the addition of blood altered the result.

I could go on, but then this comment runs the risk of becoming absurd. I love this story, and printed a copy so that it can travel with me.

[eighth-horizon.livejournal.com]

>>I never really felt the need to want more information on it.

Oh, whew. Thank you! I didn't want it to be the focus of the tale so I broke it to Friske that he just wasn't going to get his story told in this one. He pouted and tried to throw me off the bridge but I mocked him with more Python until Dean yelled at me to get off his damn bridge.

[el1ie.livejournal.com]

Can't think of anything original to say here.

Brilliant story so full of visuals and twists and turns.

Thanks so much for sharing.

[eighth-horizon.livejournal.com]

Original is totally overrated! :) I'm thrilled with what you did say. So, thanks.

[desertport]

I really enojoyed this. The whole process of getting to the truth of Dean's story was totally engrossing. And what he said about following Sam anywhere, hee. And the dialogue? Perfect. So them.

Also, Dean re: the bridge--Let's blow it up. *lol* Sam's reaction, too, exasperated resignation. So them. Loved this. Thank you for sharing it!

[eighth-horizon.livejournal.com]

THANKS!

And, the icon. It kills me.

[strawberries007.livejournal.com]

Wow, that was good. I really liked it--especially the end:

Sam turned out to be right about No Quarter. It was a killer song, when done with a decent vocal.

Ahh, it kills me :) Very nice job.

[eighth-horizon.livejournal.com]

Thanks!

I definitely have a thing for singing!Dean. :)

[jonesandashes.livejournal.com]

This was absolutely *amazing*. I've read a number of your fics before, but I'm thinking that this one trumps them (and goodness knows, that's not easy to do). :P Thanks so much!

~Jones

[eighth-horizon.livejournal.com]

Oh, damn, thanks!! XD

[eloise-bright.livejournal.com]

Here on a rec by janissa11. I've only just started reading SN fic, and I'm so glad this is one of the first. The delicate interweaving of a wonderfully creepy plot with some character angst was perfect.

This is the standard by which I will now judge SN fic. It's quite a high one. *g*

[eighth-horizon.livejournal.com]

Wow, thank you! Okay, I'll try to live up to it. LOL